The world's most depressing book.

I have always been a huge fan of depressing books. They can at times offer an emotional beauty, and insight that is difficult to find in their more cheerful counterparts. Leaving Las Vegas has been my all-time favorite for years, followed closely by Requiem for a dream; Johnny got his gun, and 1984.   These are the books that make me want to cry, but also feel and think. They are all depressing, but it is the passion that you see when you read between the lines that offers hope. Their misery inspires, because with misery also comes feelings.

Recently I have discovered a new book that is unlike all the others. A book that is so void of feeling it brings new meaning to the word grim. A book so hopeless it could not have possibly been written by one person, but was a joint effort by many. People  who choose to torture us with charts, and correlations  rather than soothe us with words. Those who live to bludgeon with the truth,  strategically placed  to show that there truly is no light at the end of the tunnel. Yes, I have discovered the world’s most depressing book, and it is the  text book for my Developmental psych class titled Development through the lifespan……the fifth edition.( God help us all, there were four other editions before this one.)

I made the disturbing discovery early on in my Psych class when I was reading one of the first chapters.Growing a little bored; I decided to skip to the last few pages to see how it all ends. It was there that I read I have a one in five chance of dying comfortably, without pain or distress. I am not quite sure how the contributors to the book managed to come to that conclusion but it was at that moment that I decided this has to be the most depressing book I have ever seen.

What I learned from the book in a nut shell is, the only time we are not completely damaged is during our time as a zygote. Had I known all of this then I would have appreciated those two weeks much more since it is clearly all downhill from there. By the time we have made it to an embryo there are all these potential teratogens such as drugs, alcohol, nicotine and environmental pollution waiting to do us harm physically as well as mentally. Then if that weren’t enough  before we can barely coo, or babble our parents are almost sure to damage us even further with poor nutrition, lack of breast milk, their  non-authoritative child rearing, decision to get, or not get a divorce , maltreatment  etc. Finally we reach that stage of  life where we start to question what is wrong with me? Which one of my parents dropped me on my head, or did I really fall as they tried to claim ? Did the family cat really go off to live with Uncle Ed, or was he murdered? While we sort through all of these issues in an  an attempt to repair, or accept the past  that is usually when we start to physically deteriorate. Macular degeneration, dementia, osteoarthritis as well as hair loss. All  of this  leading to a stare of  terminal decline where we return to the final insult, our one in five shot at passing away in a pain free/ comfortable state.

A developmental psych class can be rough. It not only causes you to consider your own mortality, but also makes you examine your past in an attempt to figure out what makes you who you are today. To put it more bluntly at times it feels like you are being beaten up by both ends of the life span. This is not an easy thing for anyone, but especially for people like me who prefer to spend their life in a happy state of denial a class like this could  come close to torture. Fortunately unlike the book the class was not void of hope, in fact it was far from it.

I have to wonder is there a way to make the future sixth edition of the book a tiny bit more cheerful. Perhaps some cartoons may lighten things up a bit. Maybe even a better ending? If Hollywood were to ever make a movie based loosely on the book they would certainly need to fix that ending. Even The little match girl was rescued by her grandmother disguised as an angel.  I want my happy ending desperately even if it is all BS. It certainly did not harm the Little match girl any to hallucinate a kind face before she eventually froze to death. Reality is overrated.Thank heaven the book was a rental ;)